How far ahead should you plan...?!
Answers: if you want a party on your birthday? Particularly if it's in January, just a little over 2 weeks after Christmas? I've had a few good ideas during different years and have never been able to use them. No time to do after Christmas or even before when I've got to prepare for Christmas. I don't beleive in having one for no real reason--that wastes time and space I'll have to rent (since I can't do it at home). Although now everyone at work seems to hate my idea and I don't know if anyone will come (one person seems destined to discourage others) and I really have no one else to invite.
I completely understand where you are coming from. My husband's bday is exactly 1 week before Christmas - December 18. I wanted to do something really special for his 30th bday. So, knowing that the holidays are a hard time for everyone, I let all of our out of town friends know nearly a year in advance... I know that sounds crazy but if you knew his friends it wouldn't seem like it, lol. I started making plans and reserving things like a venue and caterer, etc about 8 months in advance, b/c I knew other holiday parties would potentially interfere. It turned out that all of my ridiculous pre-planning and repeatedly reminding people of the date paid off. Most everyone was able to attend which I took as a huge compliment since I had the party on Dec. 16 when normally people are crazy busy. Have your party whenever you want to and don't let one person ruin it for you... it kind of sounds like you may be letting this one person psych you out. People will come and you will have a great time!!
what about a yahoo person?
You can come up with a plan whenever you want. At the beginning of November let everyone know when in January the party will be. Reserve your space as soon as possible and finalize your plans regarding food, music, drinks etc. Make any final arrangements in November, then in January you'll have two weeks to get everything totally set. No one has anything going on in January so they will love a good excuse for a party. I'm sorry if your co-workers are being jerks. Maybe just keep your plans quiet until you're ready to tell everyone the date of your party. If you have one good friend to help you plan or bounce ideas off, that would be better than asking alot of people their opinions. Good luck, plan the best party you can, be prepared and you'll have a great time.
Here's my opinion: You can have your birthday party whenever you want. You can take ideas that you've already had, and use them again (or for the first time) You can start planning now, or wait until the last minute.
But as your question seems to mostly be about timing, I just want to share with you something that I've always done with my children (and later with others as well). Your birthday celebration is NOT about the day when you were born. Who cares if it was the 12, the 16, or whatever. Who cares if it was even in Jan or Feb or some other month. The date (nor even the month) are not the most important thing to be celebrating. The thing to celebrate is THAT YOU WERE BORN. So, if you choose to have a birthday party, you can choose to have it on a day other than your birthday. Because your celebration is that you are alive, that you have friends that you can share your alive-ness with, that you want to celebrate that you've been around as long as you have, and celebrate that you can continue to share this time with others.
You say "I don't want to have a party for no reason"
I say "Have a party--call it a party. Call it a birthday party if you want to" And if the timing of a few weeks after Christmas isn't working for you, have it on your 'half-birthday' (July?)
Just don't give up the idea of celebrating your life while you're still here. So many go on without ever throwing that great party, and when they look back, they wonder "what was I waiting for?"
Throw the party and have fun with it!
Good luck on your planning and party-ing!
Candella