Is it rude to limit drinks at a wedding?!
Is it rude to limit drinks at a wedding?
I am planning my wedding for next year. But I am in the midst of a dillema. The liquor at our venue costs an arm and a leg. I definately want liquor at the reception, but I want to stick to my budget. Our venue has a plan where we can pay 8.00 per hour per guest to have unlimeted well and beer drinks. I am having 250 guests (I have a huge family and dont want to go less). I was thinking of paying for 3 or 4 hours of unlimited and then for the last 2 hours have a cash bar. IS this rude? Many of our friend are in their mid twenties so we want to have a good time.-- Thanks!!!
Answers:
My daughter had welcome drinks, wine with the meal & the wedding toast, it was then pay for your own. If any body wanted anything else they paid for it.
Her friends are all 20 something & she said if they dont like it they can go home.
She had a very limited menu with the same opinon if your hungry or kids dont '' like it'' tough. She was lucky no vegatarians, but she did plan for it.
We had a brilliant day.
Its your day you have what you want. Dont let your mother or mother in law boss you about. Listen to thier advice & take it if your happy with it.Friends who have been married will be good for advice as they have ''been there done it''
Have a lovely day.
It depends. My favorite wedding I went to a year ago we had unlimted beer and a bar and every was merry. But I would rather have some than none at all.
That is common where I live. Lotsa DRUNKS here,so make your budget work--cut off at a pre-determined point.
If they can't deal. they will go home......
Its cool. Better than cash all night.
Depending on what type of liquor your friends are drinking, it might be cheaper to buy a keg and some wine yourself and let the help serve it. Then well drinks can be cash..in other words, beer/wine provided OR well drinks if they want to pay. There is nothing "rude" about serving alcohol that they pay for, not all guests are drinkers and they usually don't expect a free ride the whole night. Another idea would be to have a cocktail "hour" of free drinks and then convert it to a cash bar if people want to continue drinking. Just wanted to give you some alternative ideas, hope it helps!
i don't think its rude,if they want more beer let them pay for it. Its a privilege to have alcohol unlimited for four hours not a necessity.
I personally haven't been to any weddings where it was drinks all night.?
$8 per hour per guest x 4 hours x 250 guests = $8000.
$8000 for drinks? Either you are insane, or insanely rich.
This is a dilemma for sure. I can appreciate how expensive weddings are in this day and age, but I would hate to appear chintzy. People in their mid-twenties tend to drink like fish so this could be a problem. Adjust your wedding budget so that no alcohol will need to sacrificed. Otherwise, I would approach your family members to take up a liquor collection.
I don't think it in the slightest bit rude "just" to be paying for 3 or 4 hours of free drink for Your guests.I work in a hotel that does many weddings around 200-300 guests, and the common scenario I'd see would be a sparkling wine/champagne reception on arrival, wines topped up freely throughout the meal,and perhaps a drink of choice for the toasts.
After that,they'd be on their own.
good luck on Your big Day :)
Not at all! Why should you pay for 250 guests to get drunk on your expense - because that is exactly what is going to happen. People seem to go wild on occasions like weddings...
Why do people in their mid twenties only seem to have a good time when they are drunk anyway?!?! (I AM in my mid twenties and I just can't grasp it!). Try to save some money on the drinks and treat yourself to and A+ honeymoon instead. Hope you'll have a great time anyway :-)
No its not rude.3 hours is plenty of time to get drunk.After that nobody will care.
No way and get out of town!!! There is no way that it is wrong to set a limit for one thing those drinks are expensive and do u want drunk people ruining ur wedding!? I mean GET REAL!!! Totally set a limit!
Dodds likes nothing else better than a free bar..........but Im not coming :o( lol Go with what you can afford!
When I gor married, we had free drinks for four hours and then a cash bar. Nobody turned a hair as I think most people expected they'd have to contribute something.
not at all rude, you are already being more than generous here
Its traditional to supply a toast, a welcome drink and drinks with meals, anything beyond that is rarely expected.
you would be surprised how much some people will drink in that 3 hours just to take advantage of a time limited bar. I hope you aren't inviting to many party animals, you could be paying for this for a very long time.
Personally, id let each guest have , say, 2 freebies or limit it to the first hour. your friends wont hold it against you, honest. you have a lot of guests, and perhaps more money that sense. Its a shame to be taken advantage of, but no matter what, just enjoy your day, Nothing else is that important. Good luck
have open bar and when it all gone so is the free drink
Not rude at all. 3-4 hours is good. Usually wedding packets only give you one hour of an open bar and the rest is cash bar. But are u sure u want to pay for so many people? Arent there any kids or minors attending? Plus, cutting the time will also allow people to sober up before you leave, you dont want a drunk getting more attention than you at ur wedding.
Yes. Don't be another Jack Benny.
yes..just give a free flow then eveyone is happy
oh no. your plan is perfect. IF YOU CAN AFFORD IT! i would hate for you to sacrifice something really important and something that really means something to you just to pay for nearly $10,000 worth of drinks for people who are there JUST to drink. Do 3 hours and let everyone fend for themselves at the cash bar. If they can't handle it, then they can leave. If they are just there for the drinks then you really dont want them there to begin with. This is YOUR day so dont let anyone ruin it for you. You are being more than generous with your offer of 3 to 4 hours.
p.s.
CONGRATS ON THE WEDDING!
That is not being rude at all. You're not footing the bill for their party- this is YOUR party.
It depends what you do & what you earn & where it is, ie if you're a super rich city type earning loads & having your wedding at a super posh place then yes you will be viewed by any of your colleagues as being cheap ... alternatively if you're a regular person who has to have 250 people to your wedding due to the obligation of inviting a lot of family/friends etc then I think you are being more than generous plus 3-4 hours is plenty of time for those who insist on getting trashed to do so ...
Basically the people there who are your real friends & know your situation will understand & not judge you ...
Holy crap - do you realize what a drunken mess you will have after 3-4 hours of unlimited free drinks!!!!!! Also - who has a 4 hours plus reception???
If you want to serve alcohol at your wedding - I would serve champagne for the toasts and cake cutting - then have open bar for one hour and then that is it.
Trust me on this - after a big wedding day and reception - you and your husband are going to want to get going.
Just my opinion - by the way - congratulations on your upcoming wedding!
My husband's best friend got married a few months ago. The bride and groom opted to do exactly what you intend to do. 4 hours open bar and cash bar after the fourth hour. The hour the bartenders announced they were converting to cash bar, people left in herds. At the end of the night, those of us who were close friends and family stayed until the couple departed from the reception. I personally think the guests that left after they had to pay for their own drinks were cheap skates who were there for the free drinks. The bride and groom went above and beyond as far as accommodating those guests for 4 WHOLE HOURS. So you see, you aren't rude; you're a budget-conscious yet generous person.
No, it sounds sensible to me.
I guess you are in the US.
In England it is not unusual to have "free" drinks with the food and for the speeches/ toasts and then a cash bar afterwards.
Have a good time.
No, I think you are being too generous.
Why not serve drinks on arrival and wine with the meal and a cash bar afterwards?
every wedding ive been too the guests have baught their own drinks, the bride and groom have to pay alot of money for everything else so why should u pay for ur guests drink too if u feel guilty buy 1 round for everyone and thats it
no its not rude at all, i think its overly generous. any weddings ive been to the guests get a welcome drink, sometimes wine at the table and then its up to them to drink or not drink. anyway at the end of the day its your friends and family, theyre all there to see you get married and wish you well, no-one will criticise or call you rude.
Its not rude at all. I have been in the catering industry for a long time now and more and more weddings are having a pay bar all night as it costs a lot to get married i would put an amount of money behind the bar and once it has gone then everyone has to pay but make sure people dont get greedy and have doubles. If people moan then they arent very good friends, afer all they are getting some free drink and food. Good luck with your wedding.