Im so frustrated, isnt it only fair that if you go to certain peoples 'get togethers/birthday parties'....."!
they should go to yours!? I mean!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.even just ONE!? if you're there for someone doing nice things/favors/attending parties etc shouldnt they go to yours!?
I have a cousin who is the same age as myself!. I am 25!. we have both been in a relationship for 5 years!. She has a kid, and I dont!. Her fiance was in prison for 2 years, and I offered for her to move in with me and my fiance (not currently my husband), she did, however, after a month, she decided to move back to another city to be around more family, because I was working, and she didnt like being alone while I was gone!.
So heres my frustration point!. I've done her a lot of kind favors, and have never asked for anything back!. Not even the $400 I lent her when she was on the streets homeless 3 months after she left my house, and got kicked from where she was stayed later, plus she was pregnant!. I love her and she loves me!.
My frustration comes here: My dads 50th birthday party is this saturday and I am planning the mini party!. all of our family get along really well, and I just think she should come with her 2 year old son, and fiance, who is also like part of the family, he is actually childhood/teenage best friends with my grown brother!.
She said they are 'low on money' which I understand totally!. Im just wondering, should I offer to pay the gas for them to get here just to see them!? They live 45 minutes away, and I am just feeling stubborn, thinking that if she doesnt come to our party, why should I go to her 2 year old sons birthday party in 10 days!? I know I know VERY CHILDISH, please, I am just wondering if I should no go if she doesnt come, and then I could mail their son a present!?
What should I do!.!.!.I think they should come!. Her dad will be there, lots of family, who by the way, EVERYONE in our whole family are going through ups and downs, so this is why im feeling frustrated!.
Thanks for your help you guys, I always take into consideration what everyone has to say, and most of the time I end up with a different point of view on the many different varities of questions I ask!. Thanks :)Www@FoodAQ@Com
I have a cousin who is the same age as myself!. I am 25!. we have both been in a relationship for 5 years!. She has a kid, and I dont!. Her fiance was in prison for 2 years, and I offered for her to move in with me and my fiance (not currently my husband), she did, however, after a month, she decided to move back to another city to be around more family, because I was working, and she didnt like being alone while I was gone!.
So heres my frustration point!. I've done her a lot of kind favors, and have never asked for anything back!. Not even the $400 I lent her when she was on the streets homeless 3 months after she left my house, and got kicked from where she was stayed later, plus she was pregnant!. I love her and she loves me!.
My frustration comes here: My dads 50th birthday party is this saturday and I am planning the mini party!. all of our family get along really well, and I just think she should come with her 2 year old son, and fiance, who is also like part of the family, he is actually childhood/teenage best friends with my grown brother!.
She said they are 'low on money' which I understand totally!. Im just wondering, should I offer to pay the gas for them to get here just to see them!? They live 45 minutes away, and I am just feeling stubborn, thinking that if she doesnt come to our party, why should I go to her 2 year old sons birthday party in 10 days!? I know I know VERY CHILDISH, please, I am just wondering if I should no go if she doesnt come, and then I could mail their son a present!?
What should I do!.!.!.I think they should come!. Her dad will be there, lots of family, who by the way, EVERYONE in our whole family are going through ups and downs, so this is why im feeling frustrated!.
Thanks for your help you guys, I always take into consideration what everyone has to say, and most of the time I end up with a different point of view on the many different varities of questions I ask!. Thanks :)Www@FoodAQ@Com
Answers:
I think she probably isnt the friend and will never be the friend that you want her to be!.
You sound like me - You would go to the ends of the earth for your friends but on their part - it is all take!. How much do you need this so called friend in your life! To be fair to her - having a child does change things but it still didnt stop me from showing my friends that I cared enough to go out of my way for them!.
You probably need to stop running round after her - let her see what her life is like without you for a while!. Give yourself a chance to meet other friends who will really appreciate you for the person you are!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
You sound like me - You would go to the ends of the earth for your friends but on their part - it is all take!. How much do you need this so called friend in your life! To be fair to her - having a child does change things but it still didnt stop me from showing my friends that I cared enough to go out of my way for them!.
You probably need to stop running round after her - let her see what her life is like without you for a while!. Give yourself a chance to meet other friends who will really appreciate you for the person you are!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
OK OK you would only be hurting the child!!! So not going would be wrong!. Maybe your the only thing that child will know that is normal or stable!. Besides he's your blood regardless of his mother right!! Poor kid get him a gift!.!. If it were her party or something it might be a different story!.!. As far as your Dad's lil party just make it nice, have a good time and don't think about her!.!.By now the entire family doesn't expect any different am I right!?Www@FoodAQ@Com
There might be something else entirely going on that has nothing to do with you!. They could be having some money problems and maybe feel a bit ashamed that is a 'milestone' birthday and they wouldnt be able to bring a gift or anything!. Or it could be that there's some difficulty between them and someone else who will be there!. Or maybe they had some other plans and don't want to say what they are!. You could call her and say "Sue!. I know you said you wont be coming to Dad's party because you're low on money right now, but I know everyone would really love to see you!. If it would help, I could give you money for gas and you know you don't have to worry about a gift!. If there's anything else thats going on, you can always talk to me and we can see if theres a solution to be found together!." Www@FoodAQ@Com
If they are so low on money that they can't afford to drive 30 miles to a party with free food, etc, then how can they afford a party for their child!? I think - if they don't show - just mail the child his gift!. Nothing too expensive, because money is tight for everyone, right!? You just have to set your priorities!. See the birthday boy later!. He's only two years old and probably does not remember you since they moved so FAR away, anyway!. Www@FoodAQ@Com