party ideas girls ages 9-16 at home formal?!

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I think doing a tea party is a good idea....if you have just mismatched cups, etc...perfect for the Alice in Wonderland theme (but doesn't have to be called that) Hang multi colored ribbons in your fav colors from ceiling or on a rod or attach to light fixture above table. Get assorted pretty hats from stores like Target or dollar stores for $1 and have an activity where guests can decorate them if they want (provide supplies, hot glue gun)....if you can, pick up cute gloves and make a display like this pic featuring them:
http://glorioustreats.blogspot.com/2010/…

Serve petite finger sandwiches, sweet treats, show off candies in glass containers or crystal. Tie ribbons onto chairs. Serve teas...even iced teas

Here are some Victorian games you can play at your party...giving you link because there's a lot:
http://oldfashionedliving.com/parlour-ga…

For a parting gift...why not make spoons dipped in chocolate wrapped in cello wrap and tied with a bow? Can swirl caramel on white chocolate...or add sprinkles, etc: can be used to dip in hot chocolate later>>>
http://www.ehow.com/how_5014050_make-cho…

Invitations can be made using cardstock and cutting shape of a teapot once it's folded...glue the other 3 sides together once you've inserted a tea bag inside that pulls out from the top (or design a cup)...have string hanging out with a pretty bead attached...once they pull on it, party details come out. Can make a fake tea bag if you want.

Favors: Colored sugar cubes are a great favor for tea parties. Use a couple drops of food coloring per half cup of sugar. Mix well, and press into small cookie cutters to make colored, shaped sugar cubes

It could be a Hollywood themed party > like an awards show
For activities you could have a dance competition or just dance like an after party.
Play tons of party games
Have a little buffet of food set out.
Judge on the best dressed like they would at the awards show and then give out little fake oscars (cheap at a party store).

Makeover party
have everyone come in regular clothes (bring their dress with them)
Do each others hair and makeup and then model down a made up runway

Fashion show party

Princess party
Mad Hatter Tea party (but you wouldn't be as formally dressed it would have to be a little wacky)

Good luck and happy birthday

how about a dress-up mystery dinner/party? whatever you decide, have a wonderful time. Mystery parties are such fun for everyone.

http://entertaining.about.com/od/kidspar…

Disney princess party.

I agree with Andy. You could also try a alice in wonderland tea party