Dear honest vegetarian.....?!


Question: let's say you met someone at a vegetarian restarant and became friends. Over time you observed your new friend eating a lot of vegtables, fruit, and vegetarian meals and just naturally assumed he/she was a vegetarian but it was never discussed. You also really like this person and value the friendship. Then a month later there he is at the Whole Foods dining area wearing a leather jacket and chowing down on prime rib! (grass fed, organic beef BTW)
Yes you're surprised but do you now think less of this person? Betrayed in any way?


Answers: let's say you met someone at a vegetarian restarant and became friends. Over time you observed your new friend eating a lot of vegtables, fruit, and vegetarian meals and just naturally assumed he/she was a vegetarian but it was never discussed. You also really like this person and value the friendship. Then a month later there he is at the Whole Foods dining area wearing a leather jacket and chowing down on prime rib! (grass fed, organic beef BTW)
Yes you're surprised but do you now think less of this person? Betrayed in any way?

No...BECAUSE that would be about the equavelent of me finding out one of my friends who I just assumed were gay weren't... Seems sort of silly to feel betrayed by that to be honest. What my friends diet choices don't have much to do with the fact that they are my friends. I don't pick friends based on what they choose to eat every day...so no I wouldn't feel betrayed at all. I WOULD have to ask them though why the sudden change for their eating habits around me though. If they never ate meat around me before I would think that to be very strange and I would ask questions about that maybe....to see if they felt bad...or felt they couldn't eat it around me just because I choose not to eat it. It would make me sad to think that someone couldn't be themselves around me just because I am out in the open about my choices to be a vegetarian and all...I want my friends to feel they can do the same..be out in the open about their choices..even though we may have to agree to disagree about that part. LOL.

He or She has no loyalty to your food liking whatsoever.
Not Betrayel.

I'm vegan and what people do or do not eat has no effect on how I think of them.

So far, there is a greater possibility that I'll like a meat-eater than another vegan person(well, so far I've never known of one that was honest) based on the people that I've met in real life.

If someone said that they were vegetarian and I saw them eating fish or ribs, I would tell them that it is an incorrect description. I wouldn't treat them differently or stop being their friend, I would just think that they were a dumbass.

Same goes for someone that calls himself vegan but eats cheese if it's free.

No not every vegetarian is in it for the sake of animals some just dont like meat (hence the leather) and some like it every now and then. I dont think they meant anything by it especially if the topic never came up.

Not at all. It would've been my fault for just assuming that he was a vegetarian instead of actually finding out for sure. Slap myself silly for not knowing any better. heehee

I'm just so used to people eating meat/dairy products (I'm vegan) that I don't make any judgements about the person based on what they eat. I wouldn't think any less of them.

I WILL make judgements about people when they start talking proudly about how they eat dead animals (in that way that meat eaters do...) - its completely unnecessary, and just makes them look stupid. It appears as though they're trying to make light of eating meat, in turn to imply that its morally acceptable. Which begs the question - if you're trying to make it sound morally acceptable, does that mean you think it might not be?

NO MAYBE THAT PERSON WAS ON A DIET THAT TIME

If you do, you can't blame the other person because YOU assumed they were vegetarian.

Well i am a veggi and it really wouldn't matter to me
.

Yeah..I think so, a little bit, but not betray. But I'd ask why

what someone eats has nothing to do with his/her behaviour

I'd only feel betrayed if the person had actually told me she/he was a vegetarian & this would be the same level of dismay that I feel whenever someone is intentionally dishonest.
If I'd simply mistakenly assumed the person was veg, my opinion of the person would not change.

I wouldn't feel betrayed. In the scenario you gave it didn't sound like this hypothetical person actually lied to me, but I made an assumption based on what I observed. I would think less of the person, of course. I want everyone in the whole world to eschew meat and other animal products so I'm going to be disappointed in this situation. I would still be friends with him, though. Clearly we had things in common and had a basis for a friendship besides the implied things.

Only if he was eating his Prime-Rib "Bloody-Red-RARE !!!!
How assinine......Don't be so dam picky & 'judgemental'.

I would be very disappointed and would, indeed, think less of this person. Just because his habits represent those of the majority doesn't mean that they're morally defensible. I would just feel sad that who I had thought was a new friend and fellow adherent to a cruelty-free lifestyle turned out to be like everyone else.

(Have you ever visited a "grass fed" farm? I have. There is nothing humane about taking an animal's life and eating it when we don't have to BTW)

No I wouldn't think less of him, his choices would be none of my business. I don't judge people for what they eat anyway, I'd be pretty lonely if I did as most of my friends and family eat meat.

I wouldn't feel betrayed by someone I'd only known for a month, especially as they hadn't deceived me in any way. In that situation I'd probably just laugh at myself for making assumptions about people and stereotyping - not all healthy eaters are veg*n and vice versa.

Hi I am a life time vegetarian.
Maybe your friend is going on a diet thats why she never take meat or less.

No, do not judge a person that way. She/he may not know, or been told the benefit of veganism (as like we are). Appreciate the friendship and be a role model of your philosophy.

People are easy to be inspired by the philosophy, but not by faith, believe or craving.

I don't mind mix with the "ordinary" and "norm" people, and usually share with them humbly upon questioned why I choose to be a Vegan.

This is a secret key ... You should able to discriminate between what is "NORMAL" and "DELUSION BY SOCIETAL NORM". Don't humiliate them openly. But show your love and concern why you want them to be a Vegan / Vegetarian, and that's why you should sincerely love and care what they eat.

Betrayed? Why?

Vegetarians don't have any monopoly on vegetarian food. Meat-eaters can and do go to vegetarian restaurants, and I believe should be encouraged to do so.

Absolutely not, what people choose to eat does not in any way make me feel less about them. I live in a very small Greek village, and I am the only vegetarian here, should I not like everyone because they choose to eat meat and i don't.

who cares what you eat as long as ou are a nice reasonable person who cares

No it's not betrayal to me. It's more of like they respect me being a vegetarian by not eating meat and wearing leather stuff in front of me but of course, it's democracy here and they have the right to do that if they want.

i think i would be shocked, and maybe think a little less of them because they didnt tell me. like they were lying.

I guess it would depend on how it was represented. I don't claim to be vegetarian, because I still eat seafood for protein at my girlfriend's suggestion. She has been Vegetarian for 25 years, and says that I am not eating enough protein, so I should continue to eat seafood.
Most people assume that I'm vegetarian, and I sometimes try to dispel that feeling, since I'm not.

I would be a bit shocked but that's it. I do not think less of people who choose to eat animals I just don't agree with it. I married a meat eater and 3 of my 5 children still eat meat.
In your story there is no betrayal noone claimed to be anything they weren't. One should never assume they know all about another person.

I would be disappointed

Well, I guess I would be surprised, just as I would whenever someone does something that I think they are not into... you know, the Christian into gay Christian music and I see them at the heavy metal concert banging their head! Whoa! Betrayed? No. To each their own.

I have met a lot of people who say they are vegetarian and it turns out to not be true.

I don't feel "betrayed." Other people are not under my control, what they do is not my problem.

I would respect them for eating a healthy well balanced diet.





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