Help?? Should I divorce??!


Question: My wife has recently become vegan. She is ragging me to get rid of my leather recliner, leather shoes, leather belts, my child hood baseballs and gloves, my silk ties, my wool shirts and coats, my one silkshirt, my leather handled hammer, my grandfathers tool box and tools (he was a saddle maker). I can tolerate the diet. I travel 5 days a week and eat what I want then.


Answers: My wife has recently become vegan. She is ragging me to get rid of my leather recliner, leather shoes, leather belts, my child hood baseballs and gloves, my silk ties, my wool shirts and coats, my one silkshirt, my leather handled hammer, my grandfathers tool box and tools (he was a saddle maker). I can tolerate the diet. I travel 5 days a week and eat what I want then.

Keep the recliner, lose the nutjob.

Yes, definitely, if you become a vegan, she'll probably divorce you saying that you are not the man she married

Yes, life is short. You should be happy and so should she.

NO don't divorce. But You should have a talk with your wife so she understands that you have different beliefs and ideas. Its like a compromise, you will eat her vegan food but keep your leather stuff. But maybe move the leather belts and silks out of the bedroom.

Couples are going to have different beliefs and is she suddenly decides to change her beliefs...that doesn't mean you have to go along with it. You have to stay true to yourself while being understand with your wife!

Good luck!

I'm not a vegan and I'm not opposed to someone being one but that's taking it overboard. I would tell your wife that you support her but your not going to drastically change your life over night. Tell her when the recliner, shoes, ties, coats, and belts wear out then you will replace them with something that is vegan friendly. And as for the childhood memories and tools (especially the tools) tell her tough luck.

I find it really hard to take your question seriously.

I think that your wife is acting (if she is in fact doing what you say she is doing) off the wall. People don't just change and become frantic. She should maybe seek some help...is she menopausal? :)

No need to divorce. Be kind and tell her that you bought these things before she was vegan and so now you might as well get use out of them. If she is a new vegan she may be ramped up about it. Most new vegans can get pretty upset because what they have read, seen, heard is traumatizing. In time she will become more accepting of the leather items and woolen clothes you have.

well i don't think divorce should be the first thing you jump too. you are married, and you should expect that things would change throughout your life and the idea of being married is to work things out. divorce is supposed to be a last option not a first. however, you two do need a serious talk. with a moderator present maybe. and you BOTH need to work to see the others side adn take steps together. she can't change her life and expect you to immediately change yours just to make her happy. but maybe she can tell you why she chose this life, maybe you can spend some time researching things yourself and might find out some reasons and choose them yourself. ask her if getting rid of things allready paid for really makes a difference. maybe donating the items will be good, but trashing them does not help anything. maybe you can agree to not buy any NEW leather products, but not get rid of what you have. maybe you can eat less meat with her, but not go vegan. there are ways to work it out together, and i hope you can try some of those options first and be OPEN MINDED and honest with each other. it takes patience.

yuo should talk to her about it first and then see where it goes

If she is that rabid about it I would say yes. You will come home sometime and everything might be gone.

Your story is a little too contrived; it would have been a bit more credible if you'd stuck to just one or two items - three tops - that she wanted you to get rid of.

your wife is crazy. but you shouldn't divorce her. just talk to her and tell her that they're already dead so there's nothing you can do about it. :P

What ever you decide please don't bring nor send her to South Texas.

Depends. Do you love her enough to try and understand her reasons as to WHY she has become a vegan? While I realize ignorance is bliss, as a VERY VERY new vegetarian myself, maybe it would help to let go of turning a blind eye to the truth about how meat is processed and how terrible conditions are, etc. (if you LOOk you will find a TON of info on this), then maybe you can try to understand where she is coming from. I know that while my boyfriend and I were avid steak lovers, we've somehow gotten closer than ever learning about vegitarianism (lol is this even a word?) We cook together more now...

All I am saying is if you love her, you will respect her views on this. If it is a deal breaker for you than you really don't love her enough to stay with her, and maybe your looking for an excuse to get out of the marriage. ONLY you can know the truth to that and on what you want to do. If your happier without her eating your meat, go for it.

If you can respect her need to be a vegan and only eat meat out of the house, then there would be no reason to leave her. But if you can't get over it.....go break her heart - but personally i think its a cold thing to do over a decision to be healthier and help boycott the killing of animals.


*As for the other stuff regarding your personal items and furniture...I agree w/ above....should you decide to stay with her, and I hope you do, maybe tell her that you think it is going a bit overboard to throw out all your belongings, but when they wear out, that you will respect her thoughts on this, and get vegan friendly items. :) best of luck, hope it all works out for you.

Divorce sounds a bit drastic, but so does your wife's reaction.

I assume she is vegan for ethical reasons, but so am I and I can't see anything ethically wrong with keeping items made of leather etc. that you already own. I think most vegans would agree with me on this one.

Also, for environmental reasons it would be foolish to bin things that are still usable. Perhaps you can compromise and give away or sell some of the most offending items, or those that are easy to replace?

Buying new items made from animal materials is a different matter, and if you love your wife and respect her choice, then it would be nice of you to make an effort not to buy animal-derived products in the future, or buy products such as peace silk, which is still silk, but without the pupae being killed in the manufacture of the product.

There are plenty of alternatives to leather shoes and woolly jumpers. However, some alternatives to animal-products are bad for the environment, such as fleece, polyester and other man-made materials. You may therefore want to consider buying wool clothes and shoes second hand from charity shops, which means your purchase won't benefit the companies that originally made the goods (and therefore contribute to animal suffering).

Good luck!





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