What is the difference between having fun and having a drinking problem? Where is the line drawn?!


Question: I drink on an average of 6 nights a week. I usually have about 4 drinks or so. I dont black out and I dont drink my money away or anything like that. None of my relationships are suffering but My fiancee and my friends say that I drink way too much and I have a problem. I do, However, feel like I have to drink to have fun.


Answers: I drink on an average of 6 nights a week. I usually have about 4 drinks or so. I dont black out and I dont drink my money away or anything like that. None of my relationships are suffering but My fiancee and my friends say that I drink way too much and I have a problem. I do, However, feel like I have to drink to have fun.

Im 19 and like that.. my fiancee however can see that its more a stress relief and shows the real me. and for us its great.. unless you are drinking to get drunk or wake up first thing and drink i dont think it is a problem and it shouldnt effect your relationship, if you are only drinking for fun like i do (in my case to get over a hard day of physical labouring work) i think ppl should accept it... its not harming you so go for it... my only advice is to be honest to yourself, if you enjoy it with no or little repocussions then lifes to enjoy so make the best of it, just dont become dependant because it can become a oneway slide downhill... take care

Your friends just have a different opinion about alcohol than you do. 4 drinks is not a big deal. Of course, how you handle those 4 drinks matters too. I would be worried if you blacked out after 4 drinks...LOL

If you start to miss work/school or cancel stuff because you've been drinking or you want to drink, that's the start of problems.

Oh and if you are starting to feel that things won't be fun without a few drinks and would rather not do them if you can't drink, you're beginning to have a dependency.

I was just like that for a long time, eventually it got worse, and now I don't drink at all. There are different types of alcoholics, not everyone drinks away all their money, or lose all their relationships, or even drink everyday for that matter. I'd think at where you are, you could probably stop, or really slow down pretty easily if you wanted to. And if your fiancee and friends are saying so, you might want to listen. Four drinks? Are you sure thats all? and your friends say you have a problem? Check out aa.org and they have a questionarre you can answer it for yourself. Good luck.

If they say you have a drinking problem, perhaps it is affecting your relationships.

Most people think that the result of drinking that would affect your relatiohship would be something like beating your wife and/or children, or insulting them or something similar. But one might point out that you can be embarrassing them as well. Or you might be insulting them and not realizing it. Abuse can come in emotional form as well.

There is also the medical problems. Even if you can "hold your liquor" without hurting your relationships, your body may not be capable of handling it. Repeatedly drinking more than moderate drinking can destroy your liver and kidneys. It can harden arteries, which causes the heart to work harder. And it can lead to diabetes.

Your liver for the most part acts as a filter to take out most of the liquor. It can handle moderate amounts (moderate amount is defined as 12 oz of beer, 4-5 oz of wine, 2 oz or less of any hard liquor) without any real problem. In fact, these smaller amounts are good for your heart. Especially beer and wine, which also provide nutrients (beer being made with wheat and wine providing antioxidants that come from grapes and berries).

But too much and the liver becomes incapable of handling the amount. The alcohol starts to poison the liver. Once in a while isn't a big deal, but everyday as you say can cause cirrhosis of the liver. It also leads to kidney stones, which have been compared to the birthing process in the amount of pain they can cause when you pass them. I don't know if it hurts that much or not, but they say the pain is very close anyway.

And your liver turns the extra alcohol to sugar. And as we know when you eat way too much sugar it can give you diabetes.

You should think about, at the very least, drawing back on the amount of alcohol you drink. It is addictive, so if only to make sure you don't get to a point where it is a problem you should lay off. Pulling it back to at least moderate amounts (again--beer 12oz, wine 4-5oz, liquor 2oz) will do much for your health and your relationships before it ever becomes a real problem.

I think you have little to worry about if you keep it where you're at.

I think most people would be shocked at how many "closet alcoholics" there are around them.

I drink more than most people, but I hold a good job and contribute to society in a positive manner.

I stay at home with my wife when I drink and I have never become violent nor get behind the wheel.

I also feel like I have to drink to have fun, but most of the time it's ok, because the people I'm with are also drinking....and yes, if they weren't drinking, I'd have second thoughts about going. (What are we gonna do? Stare at eachother?)

If you want to quit and can't, then it's a problem.

Go w/out drinkning for a week. If you miss it too much then its a prob.

Well, the first problem is that you drink 6 times a week. That means that your pissing all the vitamins and minerals out of your body as well as slowly pickling your liver. So, in that respect, Yes, you drink to much...And this drink to have fun, is a psychosocial problem you need to examine. Maybe some light therapy can help you to get to the root of the problem.

My ex husband started out that way. He became an alcoholic as time went on. I tried to get him to stop, to admit that he had a problem and get help - he wouldn't do either. The long term affects gradually built up to the point that he didn't want to do anything, if he couldn't drink while he was doing it. Drinking became his top priority. It changed his personality so much, that the only other people that wanted to be around him were other heavy drinkers. Belligerent is one of the first words that comes to mind, to describe how he was to everyone. Insulting, cold hearted, and cruel are a few others.

"What is the difference between having fun and having a drinking problem?" I'd say when you "HAVE TO DRINK TO HAVE FUN" is a pretty good indication that your problem has started. Getting defensive, or going on attack when someone tries to talk to you about drinking, avoiding people that care about you, the way you normally respond to other people, or in other situations, that don't involve drinking becomes different, are a few other indications.
You don't say how old you are, but, you are never too old to get help. Think about your future. Think about your family. Think about ending up alone because of the alcohol. Alcoholics don't just ruin their own lives. My ex husband is alone, our 2 kids don't even want to be around him because he is such an unpleasant, unhappy person. Please don't do this to yourself. Please try to get off the alcohol. If you can't do it on your own, please get help.
I know that I sound like I am preaching, but you have to understand, my ex husband's alcoholism took my kid's loving father from them, took my loving husband from me. Alcohol changed him so much that he was not the same person that I fell in love with. That person is gone, but, the alcoholic is still here.

long term i would say drinking 6 nights a week is fairly steep and i can understand why the people that care for you would address that to you....you didn't mention how old you are or how long you have been doing that....i would beware that by drinking that frequently your tolerance and dependency can increase which would require your body to intake more (like you said-you feel you have to drink to have fun...the key is you need to "feel" your intake)....that can easily spiral into a full addiction within time....often we don't see the big picture until we are knee deep involved in an addiction- that is when it gets tough and we start reaping the negative side (and the one's that love you reap them as well).....bottom line even if your tolerance level doesn't change longterm this is NOT healthy and serious odds are against you....good luck!





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