What do you do with a alcoholic daughter 21 ?!
she has been drinking for years!.i have put her in rehab 4 times she has blown a 43 and in and out of hospitals all the time for alcohol or wrecks!.she wants to come home and i have always let her Www@FoodAQ@Com
Answers:
Let her be!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
This is so hard! I am so sorry for your grief!. I speak from first hand knowledge!.
My son drank and did drugs from the time he was 17 until almost 30!. I spent my life savings (foolishly) trying to save him!. But I speak now from hindsite because a mother's love is so strong it is hard to make the right decision by using your brain and not your heart strings!.
But what happened for me is that I became so physically drained and an emotional wreck to the point that I hated my own life and how his actions was affecting my one and only shot at life and the love of the other kids who were making the right choices!.
My other son was 23 and in the Navy and he said "When are you going to learn that until you make my brother stand on his own two feet and you take away that safety net that he will always know that he can screw up and you will be there!? He is taking away your spirit and you pay more attention to him than the people who want to impart peace and love into your life!. Wake up Mom!
He was right- for me anyway!. I told my son to lose my number and my address until he was ready for me to drive him to the Salvation Army rehab!. He tried to come over a couple times and I always gave him 60 seconds to get out of the house or I was calling the police!.
It took him about 7 months!. He showed up 20 pounds lighter, filthy, broke in spirit and health but agreed to the rehab!. I told him "Only once will I do this, if you relapse, you will live your life like all the others like yourself do- broke, on the streets, or jail or dead- it's your choice"
It's been 10 years now and he is married, has a job, just bought his first house, and has 3 children!. He told me "Thanks for saving my life by doing the right thing!. I know how much strength it took for you to do that now that I am a parent"!.
Not all end this well!. Bottomline, you need to get some good counseling!. Good luck and many blessings!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
My son drank and did drugs from the time he was 17 until almost 30!. I spent my life savings (foolishly) trying to save him!. But I speak now from hindsite because a mother's love is so strong it is hard to make the right decision by using your brain and not your heart strings!.
But what happened for me is that I became so physically drained and an emotional wreck to the point that I hated my own life and how his actions was affecting my one and only shot at life and the love of the other kids who were making the right choices!.
My other son was 23 and in the Navy and he said "When are you going to learn that until you make my brother stand on his own two feet and you take away that safety net that he will always know that he can screw up and you will be there!? He is taking away your spirit and you pay more attention to him than the people who want to impart peace and love into your life!. Wake up Mom!
He was right- for me anyway!. I told my son to lose my number and my address until he was ready for me to drive him to the Salvation Army rehab!. He tried to come over a couple times and I always gave him 60 seconds to get out of the house or I was calling the police!.
It took him about 7 months!. He showed up 20 pounds lighter, filthy, broke in spirit and health but agreed to the rehab!. I told him "Only once will I do this, if you relapse, you will live your life like all the others like yourself do- broke, on the streets, or jail or dead- it's your choice"
It's been 10 years now and he is married, has a job, just bought his first house, and has 3 children!. He told me "Thanks for saving my life by doing the right thing!. I know how much strength it took for you to do that now that I am a parent"!.
Not all end this well!. Bottomline, you need to get some good counseling!. Good luck and many blessings!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
Greetings,
I am cross addictive!. This means that I will substitute one thing for another!. Obsessive compulsive behavior is a mentl condition, with this in mind please understand that your daughter has a condition, she is sick!. Treat her like that, this does not mean that you should enable her, it means that you should be there for her unconditionaly!. Your daughter is in there!!! I am strongly against rehab drugs! Zoloft, Seraquil, Depakote, etc!. believe it or not--she is spiritually disconnected!. This is a fact!!! If you believe in something greater than yourself and you do pray, continue!.!.!.!.!.!.prasyer is real and it does work!. I am not trying to preach nor am I in some kind of 12 step AA program!. I use to be in a 12 step (AA) program but what has worke for me is prayer!!!!!!!!!!! I am a very capable/intelagent person who just happened to be born with a disorder!. I have had 18 months of education on this subject!. Keep your head up and try to understand that everything happens for a reason!. Your daughter has a purpose, don't count her out, she is going through this for a reason!.!.!.!.!.!.perhaps to bring her to a stronger spiritual connection (through prayer)!. One thing I can say is that she needs to talk!!!!!! She has made a habit of drowning/druging herself in order to deal with her emotions!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
I am cross addictive!. This means that I will substitute one thing for another!. Obsessive compulsive behavior is a mentl condition, with this in mind please understand that your daughter has a condition, she is sick!. Treat her like that, this does not mean that you should enable her, it means that you should be there for her unconditionaly!. Your daughter is in there!!! I am strongly against rehab drugs! Zoloft, Seraquil, Depakote, etc!. believe it or not--she is spiritually disconnected!. This is a fact!!! If you believe in something greater than yourself and you do pray, continue!.!.!.!.!.!.prasyer is real and it does work!. I am not trying to preach nor am I in some kind of 12 step AA program!. I use to be in a 12 step (AA) program but what has worke for me is prayer!!!!!!!!!!! I am a very capable/intelagent person who just happened to be born with a disorder!. I have had 18 months of education on this subject!. Keep your head up and try to understand that everything happens for a reason!. Your daughter has a purpose, don't count her out, she is going through this for a reason!.!.!.!.!.!.perhaps to bring her to a stronger spiritual connection (through prayer)!. One thing I can say is that she needs to talk!!!!!! She has made a habit of drowning/druging herself in order to deal with her emotions!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
sounds harsh but you gotta stop her from being able to come home!. tell her that you won't be in her life as long as she's drinking!.
it sucks, but it's what you gotta go!. it'll be a wake up call for her!. jail would also be a nice wake up call if she's been driving or anything!.
letting her come home helps her a lot so it enables her drinking!. it's gotta stop!. give her a warning and tell her you think she should try rehab again!.
if it fails you should tell her that's it till she gets herself cleaned up!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
it sucks, but it's what you gotta go!. it'll be a wake up call for her!. jail would also be a nice wake up call if she's been driving or anything!.
letting her come home helps her a lot so it enables her drinking!. it's gotta stop!. give her a warning and tell her you think she should try rehab again!.
if it fails you should tell her that's it till she gets herself cleaned up!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
DO NOT LOVE HER TO DEATH!. I was in her shoes, it quickly went from drinking to drugs!. I ended up robbing someone very close to me, and spending quite a long time away from home, my family, and my 3 kids!. It was the BEST thing that could have ever happened to me when I went to court and expected my parents to bail me out again!.!.!.but this time they just could not!. My dad hugged me and said "baby I love you, but your going to have to learn" I came home a different person 2 years ago!.!.!.!.again DO NOT LOVE HER TO DEATHWww@FoodAQ@Com
You can't be an enabler!. You both need a counselor!. She has to find out why she drinks!.!.!.a counselor can help her!.!.!.but ultimately!.!.she has to want to help herself!.
you will benefit from a counselor also because of your feelings of guilt and despair!.
Seek help now!.!.!.they will be able to give you sound advice!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
you will benefit from a counselor also because of your feelings of guilt and despair!.
Seek help now!.!.!.they will be able to give you sound advice!.Www@FoodAQ@Com
You should talk to her about how you feel and how it affects her life as well as the people who love her!. tell her that you care about her and that you don't want to see her wasting her life away!. Tell her it is so unhealthy and get her help!. Best of luck to you and your daughter!. :)Www@FoodAQ@Com
get here help and forcer her to do it she will thank you laterWww@FoodAQ@Com