How do I brew my own beer?!

- Get a copy of either John Palmer's "How to Brew" or Charlie Papazian's "Complete Joy of Homebrewing"
- Get the necessary equipment (some of which you may have around the house) - brew kettle, fermentation vessel with airlock, thermometer and hydrometer, racking cane and tubing, bottle capper and caps. FWIW most homebrew supply stores sell the equipment as a package to get you started. If there is no store near you try NorthernBrewer or MoreBeer online.
- Choose an extract (not all-grain) recipe for an ale (not lager) and get the necessary ingredients. Again, look to your homebrew supply store.

Everyone's process is customized for their equipment and facilities. You'll develop your own after a couple of batches. In general focus on the following:
1. Cleaning and Sanitation. Everything that touches your beer from the time you start until you're pouring it into a glass must first be cleaned (I use PBW) and then sanitized (I use StarSan). 2 steps. This is the most important aspect of brewing.
2. Fermentation temperature. It is better for the yeast if the temperature is constant but not optimal, rather than swinging wildly above and below the target temp.
3. Know your process. Before your initial brew session, make a checklist of all equipment, ingredients, and brewing steps. Tape it up somewhere easily visible.
4. Relax. The ingredients want to become beer. As long as you have good sanitation you will get something drinkable and probably something quite good.

As an extra tip - listen to Brew Strong on The Brewing Network. (http://www.thebrewingnetwork.com)

Homebrewer

Start with a book by Papazian, The New Complete Joy of Home Brewing. It seems to be on eBay perpetually. Read the first 40 pp to get the theory, then find a recipe for an all-extract ale. List what you need. Then Go to http://byo.com to find a source, either local ("Resources") or online (list of advertisers). Order. Brew. Bottle. Wait. Enjoy.

What equipment and ingredients do I need? What Is the process to brew the perfect beer?

Thank you

Get a book there are lots of them.