If someone humiliated you this way, how would you handle it?!
Then one woman came to the party & when I offered her some of the beer, she was surprised. I asked her what's up - and the first thing she says is "tom do you drink??? I never thought someone like you would drink!" and she laughed at me mockingly.
I found that very shameful and humiliated. I mean I am a 30-year-old adult & I buy the best quality of beers - but all she thinks is that I am a kid & I'm not supposed to know anything about alcohol?
Have you ever encountered this type of situation before? How do you handle it if it happened?
Answers: I came home at night and bought some beer, initially for myself - but then seeing that my roommates were home as well, I decided to share the beer with them. It was some of the finest imported German & Czech beers which they're rarely accustomed to drinking.
Then one woman came to the party & when I offered her some of the beer, she was surprised. I asked her what's up - and the first thing she says is "tom do you drink??? I never thought someone like you would drink!" and she laughed at me mockingly.
I found that very shameful and humiliated. I mean I am a 30-year-old adult & I buy the best quality of beers - but all she thinks is that I am a kid & I'm not supposed to know anything about alcohol?
Have you ever encountered this type of situation before? How do you handle it if it happened?
You can take it in light and throw another joke in "Tom do you drink, never thought someone like you would drink" Respond in kind that "I thought it would be a perfect day to start"
However if it was rude you can always throw back a comeback, "Tom do you drink? I never thought someone like you would drink" Respond "Hey I figured I needed to find a way to get you to look cute, a couple more cases and we should finally be there"
She sucks. I take it she doesn't drink and looks down on drinkers. All you have to say is Thomas Edison, Ben Franklin, and Albert Einstein were all alcoholics so shut the F up.
I think you are over-analyzing it way too much for being a 30 year old guy. Who cares what she thinks, its not like shes your wife.
I don't think she meant it offensively. She probably meant that you seem sort of wholesome or like a "Mr. Nice Guy" type. I would have just said, "Yep I do drink, I'm not such a little boy after all...and I have damn good taste in alcohol as well!" Don't sweat it so much =)
She seems like a very strange individual.
but, what do you care?
you could just ignore her.
I would have laughed at her back and told her:" Yeah I drink, and I also like to do aerobics in the house naked with a boa around my neck! I bet you didn't know that about me either!" or "If you don't tell my parents, I won't tell yours :D"
She's just an idiot. That shoudln't affect you. As you said you are a 30 year old guy, you have no justifications to make.
Should have said..Yes and another bad habit i have is talking to snobby biatches like you.
I'd tell her, "Yes I drink. It's a regular hobby of mine. And it's just me! I'm the only one doing it! An ancient tradition, and a billion dollar industry, and I'm the ONLY one supporting it you judgmental *****! Now give me that beer back! YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY! Good day madam!"
See if that didn't knock her off her high horse.
Personally, I have never encountered a situation such as that. However, I do make it a point to keep my head and think "what would be the better thing to do." In this case, if I was looking for a confrontation then my response would possibly be "Yes I drink. I enjoy a good drink after coming home from a hard days work . . . and you?" The other option is to keep your head don't get upset turn around and walk away and do not respond. Instead, start a conversation with someone else.
Don't take things so personally: Sometimes you need to reframe a person's bad behavior by remembering it's not about you.
I don't see how you were humiliated. Some people are just ignorant and choose to steretype people based on their looks.
If someone approached me and told me that, I'd laugh! Who cares?
Here's a story for you...
When I was 25, I was with a bunch of my cousins (all older than me). The last time we were together I was a kid and I'm sure that's how they still viewed me. We ordered whiskey shots. Then one cousin told the waitress to also bring me a glass of water in case I couldn't handle the whiskey. What?! Well, you know darn well I didn't touch that water.
So, how to handle situations like this? Vent to someone, people on Y!A for example. Then go on with your life. Not everyone's opinion needs to matter to you. Just chalk up her rude comment to ignorance and pettiness.
Oh, and if you were drinking Warsteiner (German), good choice. If not, give it a try.
Tom, trying to argue, embarrass, verbally outwit, or humiliate a women in public is never a good strategy. Remember the first rule of the playground "don't hurt the girl". You'll only end up looking wrong in someones eyes. Best thing to do is just muster your dignity say something ambiguous like "interesting", do an about face and walk away. Calmly. If this is her M.O. others will know and secretly nod approvingly at your withdrawal. Don't let yourself be out flanked later on if she approaches as a friendly. She will still have Jihad on her mind and may be just attempting another go at you. Persevere. Next time she's around, case out her car and look for video cameras. Cut her tire stems with a pair of side cutters. Don't tell a soul until the statute of limitations expires. If you have an opportunity at some point to give her a venereal disease all better. Then tell everyone.
Dude you are revealing yourself more and more if all this is true
I think instead of being so sensitive and shamed etc you should pick one of these women that your roommates bring around and take them into your room and tell them to tell you what fantasies they have of you that you should act out
I am very willing to bet dollars to donuts that you cut yourself off from a lot that you could have
and you could easily end up ten years from now with the only difference being that you would then be 40 and still worried about what others think
SO WHAT what they choose to think!
Go make some mistakes
let them laugh
keep making mistakes until you start laughing too
Gawds I wish I was where you are to smack you upside the head and drag you out to someone's bedroom and toss you in naked and drunk and when you come out of that one, toss you in another
that shock you?
am I being disrespectful?
I am trying to help
obviously I cant do much more than outrage you with words but dude I hope some woman or guy if you prefer finds some way to draw you out of your shells and fears and helps you laugh and enjoy while you are still in the prime years
Why should you bother? You are an adult, you like your drink, you drink what you like !
To he** with her !
I would have said in a calm voice - "You assume too much."
Bend her over and kick the beyatch out of your house